Monday, August 31, 2009

Twilight Princess Update Numbah One...For me Personally.

This is all for myself, not ment to be tead by others:

Time: (Time Read on the Save Screen)
Beginning 1st Run - 1:30
Beginning 2nd Run - 1:05

Forest Temple 1st Run - 3:50
Forest Temple 2nd Run - (FOR TONIGHT)

Geh....Have to practice...try to make it under up to the 2 hour mark...hopefully...make a 3rd run through up to the end of the 1st Temple to see if I can make it under the 2 hour mark. I will trudge up to the 2nd Temple and see how far I can get, and try that again As soon as I can. With visitations for my grandfather in the hospital, and cleaning up the house, it will be hard, but I can do it X3

ADF incident - my side of the story!

Allright. for those who are new to this whole incident, me and this guy kept going head to head at each other in the past about my characters and how he took some of my commission worked characters into his own characters, calling them "original". We finally led to the agreement that me and 2 other people created and he and I both agreed to the standards (mind you that he wasn't willing to listen UNTIL I got him suspended on Y! Gallery about this incident).

Months passed, and all was allright. I would check up on his DA page every so often, to get a chuckle every now and then about "The World of Phillip" and I would laugh at his lies at how he lives in PA, which he live in NJ, and how he had a few things going on, and seeing his "new self" which looked like he hadn't eaten for weeks since he lost the pounds too fast, causing his body to look a bit deformed. However...

About a few months ago, an image caught my eye in his gallery. I opened it up to reveal that he indeed posted my picture up with him and claimed that I was his "ex-girlfriend". This was very irrating because I NEVER went out with the guy in the firest place and I realized that he was, once again, in his fantasy world and it angered me to no end. I DO have higher standards, and besides, the last time I OFFICIALLY dated was WAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY back in 8th grade of middle school. Really...I don't know what gave him the idea to think I was his in the first place or what it was going to get him in the end. Also the fact that he posted my real self up on his DA irratated me because I hate how I look, and it was uncalled for since I didn't give him permission to do so.

I couldn't fight back about it, so I just tried to ignore it and move on. However, recently, he posted a picture of Ko up (drawn by Ryosuke and colored by him) I suupose to see how I would react. This irratated me too since he then broke our agreement COMPLETELY.

It seemed that someone else seen this and understood how I felt, and created an account called ADF-Fuensalido and photoshopped a picture of his face on Sakura Haruno from Naruto. It was a blessing from the heavens and I immedietly too the opportunity to comment and ask who this angel from the heavens was. It was then that ADF ASSUMED it was me, but I can't take the awesome credit that this person did. It wouldn't be right.

So now I am supposedly the evil mastermind behind a group of "thugs" and making them do the dirty work, when really, they chose to do it themselves. I have no control over their actions. For now, I just want to say that I feel better knowing that people understand how I feel towards this and feeling helpless since I can't do a thing about it. His watchers will never hear my side of the story and now he is making conditions once again, thinking he has the upper hand. It ticks me off and I want Justice to be done. I want Karma to hit him where it hurts for him because he needs a reality check. Calling me his Ex-Girlfriend and claiming he lives in PA and placing my characters up won't make him popular and get watchers and more pageviews. It makes him look like the laughing stock of the internet and it won't make people trust him anymore.

That's all I have to say about this for now. An update blog entry will be up by the end of the day, plus a video to vent out about this situation, basically talking about what is here, plus much more to get things off my chest.

What Am I?

I guess this is something that has been plaguing my mind. I have been confused until a few have told this: "I'm not a good person."

I try to be as nice as I can, and being social is still new to me I suppose. I was never social at all back in my earlier years as a kid. I couldn't because I was always sick at home, hardly interacting with the kids. And when i did, I would get mocked for being the tallest kid in grade school or wearing glasses and hearing aids because I was a stress baby. It wasn't the best of times. I ony had 2 friends at that time, and they moved away later, leaving me with no one but videogames and family members to talk about that share the same things in common..

That changed during the run of my senior year in high school when I met a good friend of mine. Senya was an awesome person, a bitch, but I admired her for that. She spoke her mind, not caring about others, and cared about her friends' safety and support, regardless she was a year or two under me. I began to grow fond of her, and we shared the same interests. It was an awesome friendship and I knew that she changed me the most out since well...she was technically the only person who I talked to at that time in life since I was having issues with so-called "friends" that forced me to dress differently, or make me do things that I knew I shouldn't and yell at me for being open minded. It hurt a lot and I was fortunate to meet up with someone like her....she made me become "me"...

that was until she moved off into Florida, where I have the hardest time contacting her. I once again, close myself up and try to be cheerful to everyone around me, regardless of the mental chain I gave myself. I know people reading this might disagree with me at this point, but what I speak is the truth I suppose..

But, as time went on, This chain has been tugging and tugging. COnstant bickering from parents breaking down this chain with verbal abuse, making me feel like I am worthless in the world, and a few friends online and offline cheering me up as I try to block out the pain within my head, afriad that one day, this chain will snap.

I fear of losing friends. that is the most important thing to me. Family will always be there for you, but as friends, I enjoy talking to them about the things we hold in common and have an awesome conversation and support each other. When friends argue, I get scared about whos side to be on, and/or, speak the mind and get ridiculed by both at once. I fear all of this and I attampt to put up a front by being mean and nasty.

However, I think that the facade has lost, and now, my mind has made me become something I don't want to be...mean, verbally abusive to everyone, and just right rude at times. I hate how I feel about it, and that makes the chain slowly calm itself down, until the next brutal assaults arrive.

I guess I just wanted to type this to vent and make me feel better...or maybe for people to understand how I am feeling. As I type this, I hold in everything I would like to type out about all my problems, emotions, and everything else. I feel that I have been molded by people to be what I am now. I feel, after thinking about this, that I am not who I wish to be at all.

Who am I?

I guess....leaving behind all means of communication from internet and irl to be by myself as much as I can will answer this for me....regardless if I like the end result or not..

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Thank You's and Updates

We have succeeded in all the donation streams thus far. I would like to thank everyone who went to the OxyCleanStreams and donated from the 2 cents and beyond, and just being there to support everyone within the 36 hour stream of hell. They do take a lot out of you >>"

We have been succeeding very well for the first 2 BIG streams so far, and we aren't sopping there. THe next BIG donation stream Will be starting on Friday September 18, 2009. This donation is for helping out ze aminals and we have yet to figure out which charity we will be supporting. In honor of the animals, we will be playing games with animal support. Examples are Sly Cooper, Sonic, etc.

That aside, I wish to talk about the main reason why I am making this entry..

September...technically a fresh start to a year (minus New Years of course) and I want to start out fresh myself. As many people allready notice by now, but it is REAL hard to get in conact with me internet wise and that I haven't been on as much as I normally have been. There is a simple reason for this.

I am trying my best to stay clear from the addicting drug that is the internet. It sounds impossible, but I know that I am able to pull it off. I have a goal set for me by May 2010, and in order for me to keep it, I must stay away from the internet...at least for a few months. It is distracting and I lose track of time whenever I'm on it. It is a problem and this would be the only solution. I'm also missing out on a lot of things because I shackled myself to the computer and exploring the internet. I'm starting to want to do other things, explore, and just try to find myself I guess.

I've been nothing but a pain in the butt to many people and since I haven't gone to a single family event this summer, and frankly...I'M BORED!!!

So, in order to fix this, I am planning on roaming around for a bit, do different things, and try to change for the better. I'm sure that my goal will be met, and I will indeed attend the streams that our group will be holding. I will attempt to be on during the weekends and once in a while on the weekdays so I don't go "Cold Turkey" from the internet and go thru withdrawl. Frankly, I like it this way. That way, people can still get to me, and I can actually do what I WANT to do.

So yeah...that's all I have to say. Take care all! See ya later! X3

Monday, August 3, 2009

Topic of Depression and "Feeling Emo" >>''

People handle this sort of thing in different ways. Some like company, some like to be alone, some like a quiet area, some like it with something ringing in their ears. It is wierd for those to now hear of a few of those things, but there are a few ways I handle all of my depression.

1.) Being Alone. It is something I like. I hate people bothering me and pestering me, only to make my attitude grow worse and I think things that I shouldn't, and that I will regret it later. It only makes things worse for me in the end.

2.) Listening to Soft and calming songs. The soft music tends to calm me down but also let out all my pain with a few tears. It sounds corny, but hey, it works for me and it makes me feel a bit better, even though my eyes hurt at the end from the crying XD

3.)Taking a nap. Usually people think that sleeping is like resetting the day. I just do it to try to get anything out of my system that's left over from the previous 2 methods and just sleep it off. I usually calm down after words and I feel a bit better too.


Those are the main ways I overcome the so called "Emo" urges XD. If you have your methods, comment about them with this blog entry. They may just be interesting. Well, that's it for now. See ya later >=3